Wednesday Am Ot

Sorry about Monday, and thank you to whoever posted the OT (guessing k2b since she's Johnny-on-the-spot when others are remiss, so thanks, k2b). There was a health emergency which took me out of town, and I'd left my phone at home. I was out from 1:30PM 'til about 11PM. Nobody died but I feel like garbage, at least partly because the only food I'd eaten was from a hot dog joint nearby. Basket of fries at around 3. Actually, it was cheese fries. You know, for the calcium. 

Anyway that's my excuse. I can't promise it won't happen again, but I'll try to call in and at least say I've got a bad cold. 

Me: I can't [cough cough] come in today. [cough cough]
Manager: Oh no. You're the 3rd person to call in this week. Are you down with the flu too?
Me: Worse. I'm down with OPP.
Manager: Oh no. 
Manager: ... 
Manager: Um. What is it? Is it catching?  
Me: OPP...  [cough cough] ... How can I explain it?

(Apologies for being so vague/jokey, but I'm not ready to talk about it and probably never will be)

What about you? Heard (or given) any weird, terrible excuses lately?