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Monday, April 22, 2024

In the Blue Monday Zone

As of the 11th of April, I'd only watched nine movies. Only four were ones I hadn't already seen. I sought to rectify that. I was feeling like garbage so I watched Road House ('89). The story is basically every cowboy movie ever made – Good guy cleans up the town bar (but ends up cleaning the town along the way), flat out murders the bad guys, gets the girl – and every single 80s revenge film. The eighties... hot sweaty man-on-man action and topless women galore. Joel Silver is the EP, so you know it's a quality product and not the least bit gross.

The Stranger: I like your style, Dude. 
Dude: Well, I dig your style too, man. Got the whole cowboy thing goin'. 
The Stranger: Thankee.

No review would do this film justice, and I assume everyone's already experienced it, so a handful of notes instead: 

  • Ben Gazzara and Sam Elliott nine years before The Big Lebowski, if you're a fan of a different class of silly flick. Mildly offended by Elliott's character being regularly referred to as "old man". He would have been around 44 at the time. 
  • Kudos to Kelly Lynch's utter commitment to her role as Dr Elizabeth Clay, wearing Serious Glasses and a lab coat, looking at x-rays like a real doctor. Saying Dr stuff like "broken bones" and "stethoscope". Tuts at Tai Chi Swayze's scars but is attracted by his glistening DANGER muscles. He flirts back. A meet cute for the ages. When she's done doctoring, she goes back to her busy busy life as Hot Lady (with Brains! sans Serious Glasses!) Love Interest. Pain don't hurt.
Nobody puts Baby in the corner. Nobody but Kung Fu Bodhi, that is.
  • Segue to a more interesting Lynch: Kathleen Wilhoite is a waitress at The Double Deuce. ("Double Douche," says Elliott. Oh, touché, Sam. Touché. Or should I say... Douché?) Wilhoite was Lucy Moran's sister, Gwen, in Twin Peaks season 2, ep. 15. Typecast as a pesky chatterbox in all her roles I've seen, a Chatty Kathy indeed.
P Sway as Sam Wheat in G-g-g-ghoooost!: "Ditto"

  • I don't know if Swayze and Elliott ever worked together again, but Swayze did appear in Donnie Darko (2001) with Katherine Ross, although they have no scenes together, who's been married to Elliott since 1984. That movie is younger kid's favorite thing, as I think is appropriate for her age, and wants to be Frank the bunny for Halloween. I think it's an OK movie.
  • John Doe of legendary punk outfit X is an incompetent henchman, the only nephew of Gazzara's Brad Wesley, the boss. Now I can't get "Soul Kitchen" out of my head. Bastards.

Sam "High and Tight" Elliott as Mickey Obi-Wan Miyagi. "Stay gold, Pony Boy. Stay gold."
The most powerful moment in the film.*

A curséd double feature: later in the day, I watched Zone of Interest (on MAAAAAAX), which is what I wanted to write about as it's an outstanding film, but I don't have the bandwidth this morning (8:30ish on April 16). I'm waiting for a teleconference with the doctors who assessed younger kid for ADHD and mood disorders. I'll update at some point with the diagnoses. Maybe. Mrs will want a hug, but she's at the office, and I'm trying not to anticipate how the conversation will go because that road always leads to Major Depressive Episode IV: Ugh, No Hope™. So, Road House ('89) it is.

Just two dudes flexing and karate chopping each 
other on someone's lawn. 

            Or maybe it's a metaphor?

Man vs Same Sex Attraction, perhaps. 
Muscles that kill 
or muscles that save lives? 
Dalton has to make that 
                                        impossible choice 
and learns they are one and the same.

Dalton: Now I've had the time of my life, no, I never felt this way before. Yes, I swear.
Jimmy: Then follow me on Insta!

But the one who really learned something... was me. You can't stop the Learning Train once it leaves the station.

🩷GOOD EVENING, BACKTALK🩷

* or maybe it's this one, PaSwa as "Darry" Curtis: 

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